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Monday, April 5, 2010

What can I do...???

U might be surprised to see me again today...Actually, I need a favour from you all...I need ur suggestion...they are valuable for me...I am absolutely in a bad mood..or rather a sad mood...I am smiling and laughing, but its hurting me inside...So...I need ur help...

So, the thing is...the person who I am talking about is the same person who was mentioned in my second post in this blog...In the post titled
"Years Back"...The person to whom I spoke about the day 10years back is the same person I am talking about here... Lets name him 'X' for the moment...

So almost after 5-6 years, I met him again in 2007...that was when he got married...We washed off all the indifferences we had in our minds, or rather in my mind and we met...Or to say, he and his newly wed wife came to see me and my newly born son...He gifted him with a Gold Chain...I was seeing him after years...there was a bit of embarassment (atleast inside me) [of the past] in between us...Still we behaved normal and from that day, we became friends again...We spoke to each other occassionaly and shared fun and good things of life...Along with it, we also spoke about what went wrong between us years back and cleared all our misunderstandings, anger and frustrations...We became like any normal, good friends...

His wife and I too became good friends...Even if in the same city, we never met due to our mechanical life in this country...So after 2007, I have never met them also...Still, there was a good rapport between me and him & his wife...Soon, his wife became pregnant...I gave her full support and advices through phone...We spoke very often discussing her concerns and fears...I helped her in what ever way I could...through my words...Soon she left for her native place for her delivery....and last November they were blessed with a Baby Boy...I told him, that I will surely visit them once he brings his wife and baby here...

He too joined his wife during delivery and soon came back, so that he could save his vacation for the baby's baptism...In March, he went back to see his baby who was 4 months now for the main purpose of having his Baptism done and also maybe bring his wife and baby back with him...I couldn't call them in India as I had lost their telephone number in India when my mobile broke down...

Yesterday being Easter, I wanted to wish them...but couldn't...In between, I send an Easter Greetings to all my X'ian friends which also included a common friend of ours...rather; she was his friend and I met her through him...Now, today I got a reply from her for my Easter wishes...

Hi da,

Thnx for the wishes. How r you? Hpe u n ur family are doin gud. Are you aware of X's loss. His baby died a week before, had fever and was admitted has diagnosed as meningitis. X's India phone number is +9196xxxxxxx. Nothing more do keep in touch.

Love L

I am shocked...I am upset...I am sad....I really don't know what to do...I cannot imagine how could they take this in...If it was me, I would never be able to overcome this pain...How will they be...

I dialled his number...the ring went through, but after 4-5 rings I disconnected the call...As I didn't know, what should I be saying...What wil I say...I want to talk to them and console them...I know thats what a friend should be doing now...But, when I cannot console myself, then how can I console them...Having the baby with them for 4 months and then loosing him...It is unbearable...I really wish God give both of them the courage and strength to face this mishap...

I really wish, if I could hug the mother and console her...But I can't do anything...My dear friends, U tell me...

"What can I do...???"

12 comments:

Amity said...

Pray for them that God will give them enough consolation and courage to face what beset them!

That's the best we you can do now! I admire the relationship you have established with them and I salute the wife for being so friendly, coz if I were her, I will never encourage such friendship! Lols!

Thanks for sharing a lil' of your exciting past dear!

No more robotic pains?

Anonymous said...

Thats very sad :( Though I am not that matured to give you advice but still I would say the best you can do now is to assure him that you are always with him (and his wife) and to help them in any way you can ...Since the rapport between you 3 is good , you have to help them in coming out of the great loss ..Because they are deeply affected by thsi terrible loss and at the moment they need a friend whom they can confide and open up their heart , because they would be in need of someone who would help them in coming back to life ...

KParthasarathi said...

Just stay put.All consolations are friendly gestures and social niceties and they do not blunt the grief.The sorrow will have to be suffered by those affected.Further you got the news second hand.Send a comforting mail if you can.You tried to reach thro phone. There is no point in unduly worrying about such happenings.

Anshul Kumar Pandey said...

As they say, when you will stop the flowing water it will stagnate. Nothing is stagnant in this world. Everything has to change. Life has to move on. Give them time to recover. Value their privacy. They are young. I hope they will be blessed with another baby soon.
:)

lakshmi said...

Hi...it is really sad
and you should put the call through...once your friend comes online...you surely would be able to share the grief and offer solace.

Bree said...

I would try to call...there are no words, or there are hard words to say. But a simple "I am sorry" means a lot. Maybe conversation will be short, but just the fact of an "Im thinking of you" will be better than nothing at all. : (

Unknown said...

well for a moment
i took my personal life
i do not mind if some of my friend do not call me on b day
but i will surely feel bad sometimes if he dont call me when i just going through rough patch or ill
so please sorrow is the real test not the happy moments
& now u have the number too
& belive me i met my best frineds at the time of sorrow not on party

dont think much while doing good things

Aunt said...

Mol,

call his wife and talk to her...your words may not take the sorrow away, but it would provide solace to know that people care...

Yes, it is sad, but it is better for a baby with meningitis not to survive,as it causes terrible development problems..

love u

Jzt4me said...

Dear All,

Thanks everybody...Ur words gave me strength...It really feels good that each one of u took that extra effort to put in ur suggestions when I needed help...especially, some of u have been following me for quite some time, still this was the first comment they had put...That shows, that when u need help u have someone out there to give u a helping hand...

Yesterday eve, I spoke to him...TO my surprise, I found myself crying and he was absolutely fine...He said, he hasnt still thought of it as his baby is no more...so its OK..especially bcoz the baby died before he reached India...and b4 that he had just seen the baby when he was born...So...

But for his wife...it seems, she has been crying when the baby was in the hospital...but once they informed the baby is no more; she hasn't cried at all...rather she has been laughing and talking & at times she faints off...He is very worried about his wife and is trying hard for her to cry...bcoz not crying is a bad sign too...

Uhmm...and for the cause...All bcoz of the negligence of the doctor...The baby had his 3rd vaccination and was expected to have fever for one day...but when the fever didnt go even after one day, they did take him to hospital..but the doctors didn't care do any checks...instead kept on saying, its OK...even after 3rd day, even when they were forcing them to do some tests; the doctor was on the same path...ITS OK...by the 4th day; it became too serious that he was referred to the capital city's hospital and was in the ventilator and took his last breath...

My friend was supposed to go on March 18th from here...On 16th the baby was taken to Capital City's Hospital & so he preponed his flight to 16th eve...but b4 he could reach...

I tried consoling him...He and wife would seen be coming back here...as he doesnt want her to suffer in the memories of the baby at their house in India...

Wish and praying god gives them all strength and courage to pass thru this horrible phase of life...

Unknown said...

really feel good for you
just give lots of wishes to ur friend that she soon will be blessed again with a baby Jesus will have better plans for them
lots of blessing
& have a nice day
& keep on beating such spirit

Anshul Pandey said...

As they say, when you will stop the flowing water it will stagnate. Nothing is stagnant in this world. Everything has to change. Life has to move on. Give them time to recover. Value their privacy. They are young. I hope they will be blessed with another baby soon.
:)

जोगी said...

Hi.. read the post a little late..but good to know that you called them.. A true is the one who is there in such tough times of life..May God bless them !!!